Tim Collins is a Sooke News Mirror reporter. (Black Press file photo)

Tim Collins is a Sooke News Mirror reporter. (Black Press file photo)

Self-service is just a matter of greed, not better service

Remembering the old days when shopping didn’t make me feel like a thief, or on the edge of senility

It recently occurred to me that I’m doing a lot of work and not getting paid for my efforts.

Of course, the trend started when the first ATMs appeared. In my youth (OK, that was a long time ago) every bank had a dozen or so smiling tellers waiting to serve customers. At the same time, gas stations had attendants who would clean your windshield and offer to check your oil and tire pressure, and grocery stores had clerks who would actually help you find items.

And fine, before you think that I’m going to start waxing poetic about the way customer service used to be (it was better) I’ll acknowledge that the trend to have us do the heavy lifting while corporations disappear jobs and reap the profits isn’t going to go away.

It’s a matter of money. And greed.

You think that airports self check ins are about speed and convenience? Think again. One study showed that it costs airlines about 14 cents to process a customer through a self check-in and about $3 to do the same job with at a staffed desk.

A well-known fast food chain discovered that the introduction of self -service terminals resulted in customers spending about 30 per cent more. It seems that, if you don’t have to speak to a real person, the shame of super-sizing a meal was removed. I guess people just figure that they deserve a break today.

But beyond its contribution to clogged arteries, I wonder if we realize what the cost of the self serve culture has been.

The fast food chain in question has gotten slower and, God forbid if you try to go to the counter to order food. I did that the other day and the first two staff members that eventually approached me didn’t know how to work the cash till.

In another example, I was grocery shopping and found that only three human cashiers were working, all with long line ups. It was obvious that, if I wanted to get out of there before my milk reached its expiry date, I would have to go to one of the 18 self-serve tills.

The problems started almost immediately.

“Unexpected item in the bagging area!” the automatic voice cried out.

It may have been my imagination, but there was a bit of a tone there that implied that I was trying to sneak a can of shrimp into my cart without scanning it first.

The single bored clerk who was overseeing the 18 self check out terminals glanced over.

“Take your bags off the scale,” she said. “You can’t have anything on that side that hasn’t been scanned.”

Her tone at least didn’t imply larceny. Just the early onset of senior’s dementia.

But larceny is a side effect of self serve grocery checkouts. A recent study estimated that about four per cent of people using those tills will steal something.

For some it’s an act of frustration as the item they’ve tried to scan refuses to register and they resort to tossing it in their cart anyway. Some folks lie about the number of bags they’ve used and for others it’s a matter of mis-coding their passion fruit as bananas (code 4011) and getting a bargain. That’s why the machines finish up by asking of you’re trying to steal anything.

“Are you sure that you’ve scanned all your items?” they’ll ask.

For me, the final insult in the experience came after I’d scanned, packed, stowed and paid for my groceries.

“How did we do today?” the machine asked in a chirpy voice.

I stood there for a moment before actually talking back to the machine.

“You didn’t do anything. I did all the bloody work! I hope you rust and die.”

I noticed that the millennial at the neighbouring self-serve machine was looking at me with the kind of pitying look you give your Grandpa when he mis-buttons his shirt. I quickly left the store.

Tim Collins is a Sooke News Mirror reporter

ColumnSooke

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

crowe shop
Shop class receives wonderful response from West Kootenay residents

“Each item came with its own little story which was really neat to hear.” - Dale Smyth

(File photo)
Rossland council surveys residents for input on new city plan

Rosslands Official Community Plan has run its course, and the city is nudging residents for input

Amanda Parsons, a registered nurse on staff at the Northwood Care facility, administers a dose of the Moderna vaccine to Ann Hicks, 77, in Halifax on Monday, Jan. 11, 2021. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Andrew Vaughan-Pool
61 new COVID-19 cases, two more deaths in Interior Health

Twenty-nine people are in hospital, seven of whom are in intensive care

View of the city from West Trail. Photo: Ryden Wahl
What you see …

If you have a recent photo to share email it large or actual-size to editor@trailtimes.ca

Summer does provide some shelter for homeless. In winter, it’s a different story. Photo: Jim Bailey
Trail RCMP offer healing approach to mental health and addictions

People living with a mental illness and substance use disorders need assistance not incarceration

A woman writes a message on a memorial mural wall by street artist James “Smokey Devil” Hardy during a memorial to remember victims of illicit drug overdose deaths on International Overdose Awareness Day, in the Downtown Eastside of Vancouver, on Monday, August 31, 2020. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Darryl Dyck
B.C. paramedics respond to record-breaking number of overdose calls in 2020

On the front lines, COVID-19 has not only led to more calls, but increased the complexity

(Thesendboys/Instagram)
Video of man doing backflip off Vancouver bridge draws police condemnation

Group says in Instagram story that they ‘don’t do it for the clout’

Inspection of bridge crossing on a B.C. forest service road. (B.C. Forest Practices Board)
B.C. falling behind in maintenance of forest service roads

Auditor finds nearly half of bridges overdue for repair

(Black Press Media files)
Woman steals bottles of wine after brandishing stun baton in New Westminster

Police say the female suspect was wearing a beige trench coat with fur lining

Stand up paddleboarder Christie Jamieson is humbled to her knees as a pod of transient orcas put on a dramatic show on Jan. 19 in the Ucluelet Harbour. (Nora O’Malley photo)
UPDATED WITH VIDEO: Vancouver Island paddle boarder surrounded by pod of orcas

“My whole body is still shaking. I don’t even know what to do with this energy.”

Toronto’s Mass Vaccination Clinic is shown on Sunday January 17, 2021. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Frank Gunn
Canadian malls, conference centres, hotels offer up space for COVID vaccination centres

Commercial real estate association REALPAC said that a similar initiative was seeing success in the U.K.

Kamala Harris and Joe Biden are sworn into office on Wednesday, Jan. 20, 2021, at the U.S. Capitol in Washington, D.C. (Saul Loeb/Pool Photo via AP)
Joe Biden has been sworn in as the 46th president of the United States

About 25,000 National Guard members have been dispatched to Washington

A memorial for the fatal bus crash involving the Humboldt Broncos hockey team at the intersection of Highways 35 and 335 near Tisdale, Tuesday, October 27, 2020. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Liam Richards
‘End of the road:’ Truck driver in Humboldt Broncos crash awaits deportation decision

Sidhu was sentenced almost two years ago to eight years after pleading guilty to dangerous driving

Most Read